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Black Hole

from Radical Departure by CONQUEST

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lyrics

I’m facing this disaster all alone, somebody get the pastor on the phone
I’m doing things another rapper would condone
In a zone contrary to the things I’m writing
The way my sins’ arriving got my mind thinking ‘Hit the 'King of Diamonds'’
‘cause my flesh is being such a ‘jerk off’
Sayin’ “you got some unreleased tension you should work off"
now how’s that for a strong admission
I’m two mouse clicks away from a porn addiction
Don’t you doubt this, for Jay it’s a sworn affliction
I’m avoiding like the plague but it’s drawn my vision
No bra & double d’s, this struggle be
numbing my pain from all the loneliness that troubles me currently
Word to everything, I miss having sex
With the woman of my dreams that I married ‘til death
But I’m on my 3rd break up since my wife’s now my ex
& I’m so beyond depressed, I am not sure what’s next
Can’t believe how this sadness entices
Forgot who Christ is, caught up in this vice grip
Wrapping itself around me, tighter than pythons until I’m lifeless
Where the root of suicide is
Denying living water that’s survival for my drout
Got more faith in my bondage than the bible in my house
I wouldn’t doubt that this story is you too
With all your ‘scripture’ tweets, can’t pretend like you do
When I’m stuck in this black hole
Somebody please pray on my behalf, Satan’s wrath is that cold
To rob of me of my joy with insane pleasure
And i’m left to still deal with my worst pain ever
I remember getting the call from Mike Dones
telling me ‘Slave’ said the homie Bryant was gone’
So quickly I got ‘Slave’ on the phone
Screaming ‘what you talking ‘bout?’ with the harshest of tones
I’m sorry Slave, I didn’t mean to
But losing my boy & mentor didn’t seem true
‘cause i’m thinking ‘I just seen dude hours before he left...
for his cruise, now you’re telling me that same dude is dead?'
Nah, you gotta be kidding me
You’re saying every show I’m doing now, I’ll be missing b’?
And he’s no longer in present but my history
If i was ‘B.I.G.’, he was ‘Mister Cee’
Or better yet, ‘Mister B.’, an ‘MC 4 Jesus’
Got thirty phone calls the day he died, couldn’t receive it
But knowing him, he wouldn’t want us crying over him
‘cause he’s with the one who rose for him to get over sin
Well Bry’, I’m having trouble getting over mine
And the fact I haven’t cried, still blows my mind
Barely shed a tear and to me it’s embarrassing
Or maybe I’m still in denial that this is happening
Or has happened, your wife’s world crashing down
Still she walks around with a faith that I haven’t found
That I need to find, if she could have peace of mind
In her biggest storm, I gotta trust the lord to speak to mine

(chorus) 3x
God is there redemption for souls
Trapped within the deepest of holes?
When you feel like there is...
Just no way out
I pray that you meet them there.

credits

from Radical Departure, released November 13, 2012
Written by Jason Andre Roberts (CONQUEST) for SeanMessiahJaylahMusic (ASCAP).
Produced by TOP RANK for Beat Council Productions. Recorded & mixed by JET LEE at UPTIME STUDIOS in New York, NY.
Additional mixes by D. STEELE. Additional vocal message by Roberto Torres aka TOP RANK. Mastered by Don Ratney.

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about

CONQUEST New York

The 2012 album “Radical Departure” marks a new musical chapter for Brooklyn based, Trinidadian born emcee/songwriter CONQUEST as an artist & missionary musical evangelist. CONQUEST does unadulterated hip hop music that's mainly East Coast in style & influence with an alternative & soul influence that will be recognized as either ‘Christian hip hop' or 'progressive hip hop made by a Christian'. ... more

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  • Apr 6
    Sauget, IL

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